We Don’t Drop F-Bombs in Kansas

Someone from NYC recently asked me what life was like in the South, declaring they could hear my “Southern drawl.” Well, Miss, I’m from a state that isn’t part of the South, nor has it ever been. Speech issues aside, I was born and raised in Kansas, the first free state in the Union.

You see, the Kansan is confident but humble, eager but patient, optimistic but grounded. And there are levels of Kansan, I must surely declare with this post. There is the native Kansan, born and raised, who likely in their youth visited the state capitol building in Topeka where they witnessed John Steuart Curry’s vision of John Brown.

This type of historically aware, compassionate Kansan witnessed the passion in Brown’s eyes, the righteous fury that he conjured, and perhaps felt the urge to make a difference in the world. Over years of education in the first free state, this type would hopefully learn to express their beliefs in more socially tolerable manners than Mr. Brown.

Another type of Kansan is the New Local. They were not born here but moved here, either by election as an adult or late in their rearing; they have lived here long enough that they are part of the community. Maybe they have been to the capitol, they may have heard of John Brown, they may have a thought or two on Kansas’s blood, and they may even know Kansas is the first free state.

Often, however, these folks moved here simply for the cheaper cost of living. A dollar goes further in Kansas than in most any other states. They often love the life they find, should they possess a life which frees them up to pursue their interests. Money helps, too.

There is one other type, of the available plethora of Kansans, which I hope to address; The Interloper. This type of Kansan may be Native or Local, or may simply be passing through. But they do not get it. Whether born and raised here or newly arrived, sometimes the propaganda of the First Free State falls upon deaf ears. The cause, any cause, is not to be addressed to this type of Kansan.

Afforded the opportunity to visit or reside in the First Free State, I’ve seen the Interlopers snicker at our ‘backward ways.’ They know better than The Native what Kansas means in the grand scheme, and they spend time preaching such nonsense to The Local. These folks are free to have their opinion, and frankly I will have a word or two with them out of courtesy, but we shall never see eye to eye.

I may be a white, cis, hetero-normative male with a savior complex, but these labels only validate my label of Kansan: I am merely a product of my environment. My Kansan beliefs align with my country’s founding vision of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. I believe a human’s life must liberally pursue whatever allows for them to be happy in a manner as free from hazard to said vision as a society can allow.

But the Kansan can critically push the envelope in terms of what a society can allow. Following Mr. Brown’s campaign, we then had the prohibitionist hatchet of one Carrie Nation, followed further still by a rather progressive women’s suffrage movement, on up to the more modern subject of public education, specifically with regard to segregation in the groundbreaking Brown v. Board of Education Supreme Court decision.

Of course, this revolutionary history of Kansas is old news to us natives; the Locals will surely come to hear the tales only for the Interlopers to swing in and play devil’s advocate about what this state truly means. We are a heartland flyover state in the bible belt after all, and we have a litany of activities wherein one could argue against the effort; please see Westboro Baptists, Acid King, Timothy McVeigh, Dennis Rader, and honestly, Truman Capote’s whole act.

So why would anyone want to live in the most-southern northern state in the Union? Seems like something is always going on around here, especially on slow days. We catch an occasional college football game or basketball game, we drink at a rather alarming rate, and by God do we love freedom. 

Freedom to drive our trucks, hunt our bucks, and ideally be left the fuck alone.

But there are other types of freedom to which the Kansan in general is rather newly exposed. For many, both within and without Kansas, this freedom embodies itself in money. 

Koch Industries, for example, is a homegrown genuine political monolith, on top of manufacturing most every plastic or paper product in this country. This one Kansas corporation has all the money they need to buy political offices, or whole parties. You know, fuck you money. 

Of course, there is not a lot of money in Kansas and here people rarely say fuck you — either with their money or with their mouth. It is funny that something is ever thought to be the matter with Kansas, when in reality we Kansans set this new reality of politics into motion decades ago.

And so this article is addressed to the notion of Kansan upon which I was raised: The Free Stater. The Free Stater likely moved here for political purposes when the state was merely a territory, rather than any perceivable economic advantage. The Free Stater put their money where their mouth was, and then some. The Free Stater believed life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness were meant for all of humanity and they mobilized to such effect.

Ideal thinking, surely, but without an ideal which we are to pursue, we are lost in the wake of time. Being lacking of purpose or dispossessed of the ability to think plainly will not get you far in my home state. Our governor, for example, is a fine example of Democratic ideals, while our Attorney General is certainly Republican. 

(Image courtesy of lorettaflame via Morgufile)

So pull out a map of North America the next time you wonder where Kansas is located. You will find the geographic center of the 48 continental states located within Kansas’s borders, a mere stone’s throw from Lebanon, a small town in Smith County, Kansas. You will find such significant historical markers of the deeds committed on Kansas soil if you travel our highways that you will wonder how there is anyone left standing here to fight. And so you will see a fight started here, and it continues here, centered in the heart of democracy. 

You’re welcome.